It starts as a joke at first, this thing where he only eats at weddings and then only eats wedding CAKE.
When, at weddings, friends notice he’s not looking so good, when they notice how desperately he eats the cake when it’s finally served, they start to wonder if maybe it isn’t so much of a joke anymore.
He tries playing matchmaker to strangers, pleads with them to fall in love or at least learn love one another. He frightens people away more than anything else with this mad-eyed approach of his.
By his mid forties, most of his friends, the ones he has left, are already married, and it’s getting harder for him to crash weddings of people he doesn’t know because it’s harder for him to look like a regular person.
Behind his back people who know him call him “The Cake Gollum”.
Some try to help him, they bring him wedding cakes from the bakery, and he tries, he tries to keep it down, but it all just comes back up.
"IT HAS TO BE FOR A REAL WEDDING!" he hisses at one point, running out into the streets, crying, his dirty, cake-sticky suit marking him as one who has become unhinged from the world of regular people. He knocks over a police officer as he runs in search of a wedding, but only howls miserably at him.
Years on the police officer would still recall exactly that sickening smell of old cake that blasted out of the lunatic’s mouth.
He runs from the police officer, but not for long. The first bullet enters his back, collapsing his right lung. The second takes his leg out from under him.
As the crowd forms around him, watching him transform back into the man he used to be as he’s dying, the officer pushes through and rests a hand on his brow.
"Rest now, friend. It’s over now." says the officer, tears welling up in his eyes.
"Cake. I need cake…" says the dying man, his hands scrabbling in the air.
The officer fires another bullet into the man’s brain, and the smell that fills the air is immediately nauseating. There’s more cake in there than brains anymore.
As the man lays there, everything going dark, he hears another officer talking to the cop that just shot him. ”Leave it, Sam. It’s Caketown.” he says, and then there’s just darkness.